Genesis

Some of you reading this may not know the story of how my wife, Christina and I decided to begin The Core.

I graduated from Evangel University with a degree in music, and after Christina graduated, we spent a short time continuing to live here in Springfield. But it was not long until we began looking all over the country for a Music Minister position that I could fill, or even better, a "Worship Arts" position that we could fill together, since Christina has experience in drama and dance.

We both had (and continue to have) a burden for reaching urban neighborhoods, so we looked at churches that might give us those opportunities. We had prospects all over the place; LA, Chicago, Queens, New Orleans, DC, Kansas City, St. Louis and right here in Springfield. Most of them fizzled, and Chicago is the only one we ended up actually visiting. Obviously, we declined.

And it was just after that frustrating trip that we found ourselves in church one Sunday, wondering what God had in mind. Over the past few months we had been hearing Him feed us ideas about why He created the Church, and how far we have strayed from our true purpose. He was showing us a vision for an entirely new, entirely old way of being the Church. It all seemed to fit very well into our current downtown Springfield environment, but we figured we could take our ideas just about anywhere urban.

But it was sitting together on a pew that morning, half-listening to a sermon about something else, that God said it. "I want you to stay here and start The Core."

Sometimes I have difficulty relating to the way God communicated to people in the books of Job and Isaiah and Jeremiah, etc. He seems so long-winded. But in those rare times that God speaks with crystal clarity to my heart, He's always so succinct. So monosyllabic.

After church, I told Christina what I'd heard. She said He told her the exact same thing. Case closed.

Ever since then, that one sentence from God's mouth to my heart has been my staying power. Because The Core to me is not a wish, a desire or even a calling. It's a command. And that in itself is power to my embattled heart, because I know when God directs, He equips. I know that He has no interest in ditching His children while they're just trying to obey Him.

As the goals of The Core keep getting larger and larger, I am tempted to completely freak out. I've always known this stuff was too big for me, but I also start to wonder if it's too big for God and me. Of course the answer is no, but sometimes I can't shake the feeling. The attacks are just too strong to ignore.

I could try asking God to make me invincible. But I think He would rather I be invisible... so that when He does the impossible, I can join the rest of the crowd in giving Him ALL THE CREDIT.