Been too busy to write anything creative this week, and here’s why…
But unless you’ve been under some sort of pet rock, you know about this already. Turns out we’ll have over 30 garments, 9 designers, a live DJ, auctions, food tasting, and all-around good times.
Plus… When you buy a ticket, you get to help the Front Porch keep the lights on in downtown Springfield!
And now for something completely different… a list of quotes from comedian Mitch Hedberg…
On Favoritism: “I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.”
On Time-Travel: “One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said ‘Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.’ Every picture of you is when you were younger. ‘Here’s a picture of me when I am older.’ ‘You idiot, how’d you pull that off? Let me see that camera…’”
On Catch-22s: “I’m against picketing, but don’t know how to show it.”
On Falling Snickers: “I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at the store oftentimes I will drop it, so that it achieves its maximum flavor potential.”
On Paper Conservation: “I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut. I don’t need a receipt for the doughnut… I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don’t need to bring ink and paper into this. I can’t imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, ‘Don’t even act like I didn’t buy a doughnut, I’ve got the documentation right here…’”
On Following the Rules: “This shirt is dry-clean only. Which means… it’s dirty.”
On Memorability: “I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number. Something like, 222-2222. I would say sweet. People would say, ‘Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?’ I would say, ‘Press 2 for a while, and when I answer, you will know that you have pressed 2 enough.’”
On Barbecuing on a Budget: “I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas-Grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. Heck yeah, reminds me of something, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on… ‘Better flip that Frito dad, you know how I like mine.’”